Sick Of It

Being sick is awful. But being sick at college is even worse... I wish I could do a post entirely about being sick at college, but the whole thing would just look like this:

I don't actually own a "purple robe of majestic illness", but I would wear it everywhere if I did

So INSTEAD, I'm going to tell a little story about something that happened to me while I was sick...

There I was in my room, minding my own business, doing about as much as anyone can do when they're sick.

Not much

I don't consider myself an extremely lucky person. In fact, sometimes I feel like all of the worst things happen to me all at once just because the universe wants to watch me pitifully try to handle everything (and usually fail). ANYWAAAAYS, at that moment, I suddenly heard a noise that I had never heard before.

Those aren't censored curse words btw; it was an actual beeping sound

It was the loudest noise I had ever heard. It took me a few seconds to figure out that it was just the fire alarm. After several painstaking moments of wheezing and coughing, I managed to get down from my bed. But that's when I noticed something unusual...

Crying inside

My roommate was still asleep. I could not believe that he was sleeping through this blaring alarm. It was SOOOO LOUD. I was utterly dumbstruck.

I knew that I had to wake him up, but there's always that moment where you wonder, "Do I have to though?" Cautiously, I reached up and tapped his head.

Incredibly flexible

He didn't budge.

Wonder what he's dreamin' about...

Now I got nervous. I called his name out loud but he still didn't wake up. I started pacing around the room frantically, trying to figure out what to do. Then I started shaking his bed really hard in desperation.

But, again, I'm not very lucky...

Maybe he's having a dream within a dream? That would explain why he wouldn't wake up

Now I know everyone is going to hate me for what I did next, but remember that I was SICK, so I clearly wasn't in my right mind. Also, let me again emphasize how LOUD the alarm was. It's near impossible to make a good decision when it sounds like World War I outside.

OKAAAAAAAAY I'M SORRY ALREADY

Yes, I left him asleep in the room and went outside alone. But, if you ask me, he got the better end of the deal. While he was sleeping, nice and warm in his bed, I was outside freezing my butt off because it was the middle of the night and super windy outside.

The Old North Wind does not look kindly upon sick little college boys

So there I stood in the freezing cold, shivering and wheezing, while the alarm continued to blare inside. But the funniest part was that it was SO OBVIOUS that I had left my roommate in the room because our window is right next to the door. I could see him right there, asleep in his bed and clearly not outside freezing.

I think this is the first WPN comic to have actual grass in it!! #BreakingBarriers

After about five minutes, I started hearing sirens and then an actual fire truck pulled up. Then I got nervous because I realized it wasn't a fire drill and I was terrified that I just murdered my roommate on accident.

WANTED: For accidental murder (because he was sick and dumb)

Ten minutes later, the alarms turned off and they let us back in. It turns out that some idi-bro (a term I coined; "idiot bro", you heard it here first) on the second floor burned some popcorn or something dumb like that.

I admit I went a little overboard with the idi-bros, but I mean, they were asking for it

So that was the story of when all of the worst things happened to me at once. Ironically, an hour or so later, my roommate woke up all of the sudden and asked:

Coping With College Life (Part 2)

It's been a while since I've posted anything, so I thought I would take this opportunity to give you all an update on college. I wasn't really sure how to format this one, so I just threw together a bunch of different concepts.

Concept #1: Group Projects

I HATE group projects. I could go on forever about why I hate group projects, but why tell you when I can show you instead? One new thing that I had never experienced before is group papers. Just the idea of group papers doesn't even make any sense. What do the teachers even expect us to do?

These arms are way too long

I had another group activity where they made us go and "do something fun" with our group to get to know each other better and then take a picture to prove we had fun. The only thing I ended up learning is how much everyone in the group hates being in the group. The other kids decided to just stand in front of a building and "pretend" like we had a fun lunch together and take a picture of that. The picture probably looked something like this:

What if the true purpose of group projects is just for arm stretching?

And this is what we looked like five seconds later:

I like to imagine that the kid in the green shirt is actually just ascending up into the sky

Concept #2: Bathrooms

I can't believe I haven't talked about this yet. The worst part of college (and everyone knows it) is the bathrooms. But dealing with the bathroom itself is only one part of the struggle. My daily strife is multifaceted. There I'll be minding my own business.

Apologies for the partial nudity (*embarrassed*)

And then, out for nowhere, it happens...

He returns...

Mustang then begins to chant my name.

Not wearing enough clothes to allow for this much conversation

Incessantly.

That's when I realize that he won't even realize I'm gone once I leave.

And I find that hilarious.

Concept #3: Ordering Food

Sometimes when you order food, you have to give them your name so they can tell you when the food is ready. But at some point towards the beginning of the year, I found a fun little way to amuse myself. Every time they asked me for my name, I would say a different name every time.

They always can tell that you're lying somehow

Over time, this evolved into a new game. I started to challenge myself to use the name of the main character in the last movie I watched. Some of these ended up being incredibly amusing for myself.

But the biggest challenge was definitely when Halloween season came around.

I hope everyone had a great Halloween! :)

Philly

Last month I went up to Philadelphia to see Pope Francis when he came to visit the US. Overall, the trip was enjoyable and it was a pretty exciting experience. But, of course, with every pilgrimage to a major Pennsylvania city for the visit of a spiritual leader, there are a fair share of... interesting experiences to be had as well. This is just a few of these incidents.

In Philadelphia, they had us stay inside a convent and we all were split up into different rooms. Naturally, everyone gravitated towards wherever wall outlets could be found. Once they turned the lights off, my roommate (who can fall asleep literally anywhere) was immediately out. But it wasn't so easy for me...

This is exactly what I looked like

Did I mention that we were sleeping on hard wood floors? And even though we had sleeping bags, they didn't really do much comfort-wise. Whenever I moved my body at all, I wasn't sure if the resulting sound was from the floor or my spinal cord snapping in half.

If you tilt your head to the side, it looks like I'm doing a sad little dance

Somewhere around 2 or 3 o'clock in the morning, my phone began vibrating against the floor.

At first, I just ignored it because I was too tired to move any of my limbs. But my roommate soon noticed.

He's pretty good at noticing these things

I still decided to just let it ring out, but then my head started filling with all of the possibilities.

The fourth most important emergency = Secession

So I finally gave in, but the phone stopped buzzing at that moment. And then the next thing I know...

I promise that this is exactly what happened

At that point, I was too tired and confused to do anything else, so I just pretended like that was completely normal.

When the trip was over, we left Philadelphia pretty late on Sunday and we still had classes the next day. I knew that I had a class at 8 am the next day so I was hoping to maybe sleep on the bus a little bit. But somebody made the wise decision to sit right in front of the TV on the bus ride back.

 And it's a little hard to fall asleep when you have The Princess Diaries 1 AND 2 playing right in front of your face.

But some people had no trouble, clearly

We didn't end up getting back until 5 in the morning, so I only got about 2 hours of sleep that night. But the worst part was having to wake up the next morning.

This is usually the position I end up in by the time I wake up

But my brain decided to be incredibly sneaky that morning and allowed me to doze off a bit after my alarm went off.

Me trying to be logical at 7 in the morning

And then I ended up having a dream that I didn't have to wake up for another HOUR. 

It's like Inception, but with less fighting and more sleeping

Like I said, my brain is incredibly sneaky. When I finally did wake up, I barely made it to my class on time. I hardly even remember anything from the rest of that day at all.

That was a fun day...

Classy

I decided to make a little virtual tour of my week of classes for your entertainment. Or at least for my own. Here goes nothing...

Chemistry Lab

This class is okay, but I don't really know what I'm doing half of the time, so that usually leads to some interesting situations.

True Fact: I'm the only one in the class with green goggles, which always makes me feel like such an outsider

You gotta love all those beakers tho

Chemistry Lecture

Surprisingly, this is one of my favorite classes because I actually understand what is going on, which makes me feel a little smart.

This class makes me more smarter

But then, of course, there's always that one kid in the class who mishears something that the professor says and FREAKS OUT.

It's gonna be okay, Ron Weasley

But I think we all know the real reason I like the class...

The look of a champion

World Regions

This class doesn't really count, since it's an online class, but I still really like it because we get billions of points just for watching a bunch of foreign films.

Just kidding. We've never watched any French films.

Psychology Lecture

This is an interesting class for me. But it's also very wacky.

I promise that our class is more racially diverse than this

feat. my friend being sassy

Psychology Recitation

I don't really know why it's called a "recitation". This is supposed to be a discussion class, but usually only like three or four people end up saying anything because hooray for introverted psychology majors. I feel you guys...

#ArthurReference

Engineering Education

I'm not gonna lie. This is one of my least favorite classes. They don't teach us anything very useful and they make us do so many pointless activities. Especially group projects (which I hate).

Casually rubbing nose

Calculus

I don't really mind this class either, but it's always pretty boring. Also, the professor tends to say things that are kind of insane.

Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little bit

Later, doing a problem...

Distracted by snoozing punk with blue hair

Kissing the chalk?

Now watch as I roll my eyes at an angular velocity of  ^3π/₄ radians/second.

Proud of myself for making a math joke

Well, that's all for now... I hope you enjoyed that little tour of my classes :]